I’m in shock.
I’ve just been fired from my dream job.
Working for the same person for 11 years. Virtually no holiday in all that time. No paid leave, hardly any time off.
He expects me to run about after him clearing up his mess. I do his shopping and cooking too.
He’s a right bastard sometimes but, call it coercive control; call it Stockholm Syndrome; I love him.
Now with no warning at all, he turned to me yesterday morning at the bus stop and said :
“Goodbye Mummy, you can go now”
I know it’s not the long term empty nest of the departed teenager off University or a flat share with their mates, but it is a growing sense of their imminent departure. Both welcomed and dreaded at the same time.
On the down side, I’ve lost my five-a-week exercise routine. A bus to school meant a 3 mile walk back home.
On the up side, I’m saving money and calories by no longer ‘just passing’ the café with the chocolate covered frothy capuccino and almond croissants.
Also on the up side, I can luxuriate a little longer under my duvet in the mornings, without the sweary, shouty sprint to the bus stop.
Feelings of rejection from past love affairs come to mind – for I’m under no illusion – this is the greatest love affair of all.
I’ve been fired.
But I wouldn’t have it any other way.
How about you?
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This is what it’s all about Jo. When the day comes where they no longer need you – you’ve done the job you were meant to do. Be proud of yourself. Pour a gin and relax.
P.S That picture of Trump…LOL!! 🙂
Oh yes this one came from the heart. Thanks for your lovely comment Tracy x
What a brilliant blog – I love the pictures. Very funny and moving post at the same time, brilliant 🙂
Thanks so much. It’s an ongoing thing this parent and child lark isn’t it. x
Oh Jo, I’m not quite there yet but I feel your pain. I wanted to shed a tear at your drawings! Hey, you’ll always be his Mum so basically you’re just fired from bus duties, the job description is till pretty lengthy!! x #fridayfrolics
I know – the stew is bubbling away and the games bag contents need
fumigatingwashing. x #fridayfrolics
Oh I really loved this. Poignantly funny. I am dreading this day. I fear that I will be clinging onto then when they want to leave home and move in with partner ;-/ #FridayFrolics
Hopefully when that time arrives, you will welcome the smelly socks and loud music going with them. Meeting someone and moving abroad though, would be the hardest trial for me #fridayfrolics
Love this, and the illustrations. I’ve got a tween and a teen so *really* being pushed out. Then you just have to wait a decade for them to appreciate you again.
Thanks for the thumbs up Jen. A whole decade till I’m appreciated again? I thought it was as soon as they work out what they want for Christmas. #schmooze #schmooze
Totally brilliant!! Exactly how I feel – love this. What fantastic cartoons you are so clever! Thank you for sharing with me! Xx
I’m so glad it resonates with you. Sometimes the posts take a while to write, but this one tripped off my pen with great speed. Thanks for your comment Sharon. Xx
haha! that’s a twist I wasn’t expecting! Good Trump doodle! cheers, kidcandoodle #KCACOLS
Glad you like the Trump doodle. Hope he doesn’t see it or he might confiscate my crayons. #KCACOLS
I’m quite sure you haven’t exactly been fired – more like (very) temporarily laid off… depending on how quickly the homework gets hard and needs parental imput, you’ll soon be discussing terms.
Oh no don’t tell me about homework getting harder;( At the moment it’s already “I need the loo, sweetheart – ask your father to help”. Unless he wants something stuck in his excerise book with Pritt stick. x
I was fired by my son at the age of 11, and by my daughter at 16. Now they are 22 and 20 respectively, I am well and truly redundant. All I am worth is an emergency bank when their father won’t cough up, someone to cook, clean and tidy up after them, and a taxi service. I’m not even a source of advice any more (they text their father for that).
It is hard, Jo, but you will have to learn to accept it. When they were babies I longed for their independence, but when it came the reality wasn’t so sweet.
Oh Alice, I bet they’d come running if you really needed them. Wouldn’t they? This morning he had a friend sleeping over who hadn’t woken up yet, so my son came in and we had a cuddle. I cherished every second knowing they’d be precious few times again like that.
I love this post! So funny and touching at the same time x #KCACOLS
Thanks so much for dropping by and reading it x #KCACOLS
Oh no! What a shock that must have been for you! I’m dreading a day like that! My little bosses still let me do everything for them and even though it’s hard sometimes, I’m trying to enjoy it. #kcacols
I remember, it is hard alot of the time esp knowing one SHOULD be enjoying it. But there aint no SHOULDS and think Wry Mummy got it right in a post about joyometers. http://wrymummy.com/2014/01/the-joymometer.html Worth a read. Thanks for commenting x #KCACOLS
As brilliant and hilarious as usual! So true. If only mine had fired me. Got two more years till that time I fear….. Can’t wait to be no longer stressing them into the car. I’ll just be stressing them out the door instead! x
Thanks so much Siobhan. Yup there’s always something and I’ve still got DH to stress about getting to the car in time 🙂 x
Aww bless you! As much as I complain that I would like to have some peace I am dreading the day I’ll be fired! Love your doodles! Thanks for linking up with #KCACOLS and hope to see you again soon x
Glad you like the doodles Rebecca. As the song goes “you don’t know what you’ve got till its gone” (i think Joni Mitchell?) x #KCALCOLS
aww I feel “fired” now tbh and he is only three! he tells me some evenings he doesn’t want a kiss and a cuddle and he can do things for himself :/ #KCACOLS
Don’t they just break your heart sometimes ! Thanks for commenting Emma – always lovely to have new people come and visit #KCACOLS
Omg the lay of is the worst! haha! my 3 years favorite thing to do right now is tell me that i am interrupting his fun!part of me thinks it’s so funny and part of my heart falls apart because he doesn’t need me like he once did! #PickNMix
sorry, wrong hashtag #ThatFridayLinky
Ooops I replied to your comment with wrong hashtag too! #ThatFridayLinky
Ouch that must hurt! Poor you. Apparently they need you more in a different way when they grow up – my sister says her two do anyway and they are 30 and 32!! #PicknMix
Awww we are not quite there yet but I think I’ll be rather upset when the time comes! Although the thought of not having to do the school run sounds great too! #KCACOLS
Hi Maria, I must say this last week has been rather nice not having to jump out of bed so early. Its just another milestone really, like ending breastfeeding or bathing them or being able to pick them up without a visit to the chiropractor. #KCACOLS
Aw I’m a long way off this, but I imagine it must be quite a moment when it does happen! We raise them up to be independent and then when it happens we want them to be our babies again! Love the drawings x #KCACOLS
You’re so right about that. I can’t even begin to imagine him going off to Uni or wherever. Would like him to both choose somewhere close to me and a little way off at the same time. Nuts. Glad you like the drawings Natalie. #KCACOLS
My eldest daughter only started school in September, so I have a long way to go until this day. I can’t bear to think to about it, I will be the clingy mum! x #picknmix
Hi Laura, yes I shall be clingy when the time comes for him to leave home, but only on the inside. You’ll be fine when you get there I’m sure. Enjoy the ride over the next few years, I mostly loved the whole primary school thing, it was an education for me as well. x #picknmix
Great post it’s such a bittersweet moment Thanks for linking to the #THAT FRIDAY LINKY come back next week please
Thanks Nige. Bittersweet is the word indeed! Looking forward to next #thatfridaylinky
I dread this day! Fab pictures. Thanks for linking up to That Friday Linky #ThatFridayLinky
It comes all too soon – enjoy every moment 🙂 #thatfridaylinky
I don’t know what I’d do without being needed every day haha. I’ll probably have to find a hobby or something! #picknmix
I know a good hobby. Blogging. He he. #picknmix
Find a hobby? What a blogging? He he #picknmix
I have an almost 11-year-old and a 12-year-old and I am looking forward to next September when they are at the same school and can at least walk home together. I love them, but I have really had enough years of chaotic school run drives now! Thanks for linking up to #PicknMix
I can see if you have the two of them together it makes a big difference. I’ve got friends with 4 or 5 kids. Its both manic and chaotic so I blame the Greeks as they came up with the language #Picknmix
I have a 10 year old who is starting to exert more control and walks himself to school (school is 250m away). I find relinquishing control very hard but I am trying! Thank you for linking up to #ablogginggoodtime
When I first read your post in my bleary state this morning I thought you meant he walks 250 MILES not metres. Had a picture of a little guy valiantly marching to the other end of the country and back each day and being pretty late for school. Maybe that’s how Mummy Columbus, Mummy Polo and Mummy Armstrong (Neil not Lance) all the other great explorers’ Mummies felt. Thanks for sharing how it is. Jo x #ablogginggoodtime
My youngest two are in their first year at hhigh school and I feel fairly liberated now that I am not doing the crazy dash from work to school pick up. I did love the little kid stage but having teens and tweens does have some advantages. #ablogginggoodtime
Hi Lynne, yes isn’t it funny how it’s the transition stages that are hard. I’m sure I was gutted after the last breastfeed but years later can’t remember anything about it, not even the relief of being made redundant as an automated milking machine. Thanks for stopping by #ablogginggoodtime
A sign of a job well done. Enjoy the duvet! #ablogginggoodtime
Many thanks. Yes that’s how i feel too though wouldn’t it be nice to get a gong for it. Maybe that’s a post for the future, award schemes for successful (and less successful parents). #blogginggoodtime
Brilliant Jo! I’m kind of dreading that moment but I get it and it’s all good for them and you. Enjoy the lie ins!
Thanks Elizabeth 🙂 Have just heard that a neighbour’s oldest daughter has moved to London and is going to University. Bang goes that babysitter who we thought was about 13.
Our teen is a bit older, but always walks on her own to school. I think we’re at that point where we cramp her style! Enjoy those extra minutes under the covers! X #TweensTeensBeyond
Oh believe you me, I’m getting so used to snuggling down in the mornings. A few verbal whip cracks to get him out of the house on time, but otherwise it’s win win. Thanks for leaving a comment, Zoe. 🙂 jo x #tweensteensbeyond
i was made redundant 5 years ago when my youngest returned to the UK to boarding school, but was rehired last month, he is 18 next month and needs help with moving on to the next stage of his life #tweensteensbeyond
How nice to pick up with him where you left off. Hope you’ll be more than a chauffeur but at 18 he’s possibly behind a wheel already! Thanks for stopping by #tweensteensbeyond
It’s a tough one for sure and you have done good service Jo. I am getting the hand now and the flick of the hand which means ‘go, go’. You have deserved every croissant and frothy coffee and now some time back! I adore your blog and your cartoons. Thanks for joining us again at #TweensTeensBeyond, it’s great to have you. Nicky
Thanks Nicky. Glad to know I’m not the only sad sack around here Jo #tweensteensbeyond
Ahh this is exactly what the term ‘bitter sweet’ was made for. When you first see the beginning of the end it comes as a nasty shock. I have to admit I am still reeling from the realization that my kids are going to leave me – it happened this time last year. I now have one in uni and two still at home and I seem to have survived. Love your illustrations so much! Thanks for joining us at #TweensTeensBeyond, it’s great to have you.
Hi Sharon, maybe you could do what everyone in my village does, get a dog. Maybe you have one already? My friends spend their time trying to get rid of them so maybe not! #tweensteensbeyond
Loved it! We are not quite there yet. But I feel the distance growing (some days). Other days we are back to cuddles! Never know which day it will be so I’m on my toes 🙂
I specially loved how you wrote about ‘….this is the greatest love affair of all.’
Hi Nadia I got a cuddle today although it’s a bit like having the incredibly hulk in the bed with me. The duvet and myself are shrinking by the day, and this great thing lies there until breakfast lights up his brain #tweensteensbeyond