BritMums Live and the Ten Commandments

Going to BritMumsLive16, Goody Bags

Hooray I’m off to BritMums Live on 25th June. Will we behave when we get there?

I give myself a little talking to before Blog conferences which pretty much involves:-

“Now Jo, only have ONE small glass of white wine and wait until the sun is over the yardarm.”

That’s my talk.

But in case you weren’t sure of what to make of it all, and it’s your first time, here are :

The TEN Commandments of Blog Conferences

 

1. There should be no other Blogs before me

However ‘important’ anyone else’s blog seems, yours is unique and no one else could have written it.
The Ten Commandments: Though shalt have no other Blogs before me, Kate Middleton, The Duchess of Cambridge

 

 

2. Thou shalt not make unto thee any graven image

We don’t like self worship but I wouldn’t mind a little more of this ..

Ten Commandments Thou shalt not make unto thee any graven image

 

 

3. Thou shalt not take the name of the Lord thy God in vain

I know it’s tempting at times, but if you’re going to swear; just say BUM3FINALFLATdeep

4. Remember the Sabbath Day, to keep it Holy

… you’ve only got ONE reputation – look after it

The Ten Commandments: Remember the Sabbath Day and make it Holy

 

 

5. Honour thy Father and thy Mother

I’ve told my son this is the No.1 Commandment even if I’VE not always followed it to the letter
The Ten Commandments: Honour thy father and thy mother

 

6. Thou shalt not kill

(leaves a horrible mess in The Brewery for the cleaners)
The Ten Commandments: Thou shalt not kill

 

 

7. Thou shalt not commit adultery

As if, Ladies and Gentleman, as if!

The Ten Commandments: Thou shalt not commit adultery

 

 

8. Thou shalt not steal

See above
The Ten Commandments: Thou shalt not steal

 

 

9. Thou shalt not bear false witness against thy neighbour

Didn’t we all learn this in the playground?

The Ten Commandments: Thou shalt not bear false witness against thy neighbour

 

 

10. Thou shalt not covet thy neighbour’s stuff

I shall endeavour to be happy for ALL the BiB winners!

The Ten Commandments: Thou shalt not covet thy neighbour's stuff

Go and have a good time but not TOO good or you can’t say I didn’t warn you!

 

 

BritMumsLive, The Ten Commandments

BritMums

 

 

What was your most embarrassing blog experience? Are you prepared for BML? I’d love to hear from you, so please leave a comment and I’ll reply soon.

 

More cartoons from BritMums 2014 before

… and after the event

My AWARD for being funny – it says so here

chucklemums

Friday frolics, Linky life, love and dirty dishes

Don’t wait a whiley, click on a smiley!

 

You baby me mummy #thelist Mr & Mrs T Plus Three

This week I am linking up with #TheList – please come and join in!

 

#Chucklemums

I’ve got the linky bug! For some more great posts other than mine (!) click on Mumzilla the green dinosaur avatar above! #Chucklemums

Keep Calm and Carry On Linking Sunday

Click Here to Leave a Comment Below

Liberty Hen - May 25, 2016

Love the fab 10 & hope you & the mums have a really wonderful time at BML – will be thinking of you!xxx

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    Jo Sandelson - May 25, 2016

    Sorry you can’t come – but at least you are safe from all the naughty goings-on at these events. X

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Julia @ Rainbeaubelle - May 27, 2016

Haha love this! I have never been and sadly if I can’t go this year will have to wait another year! xx

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    Jo Sandelson - May 27, 2016

    Sorry you can’t go Julia but if you win, I volunteer to go and collect your award in my best party frock and promise to hand it over to you in person! 😉 Glad you like the post X

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Anne - May 27, 2016

This made me hysterical and I’ve never been to Britmums, neither am I going this year but it’s probably a good thing, I’m not sure I could abide by those commandments 😉

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    Jo Sandelson - May 27, 2016

    Great! well as long as it’s hysterical in a good way. Ha ha can you really not keep to those commandments? My type of woman though I’d draw the line at ravishing the bell hop. At least not in a lift x

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Sara | mumturnedmom - May 27, 2016

Brilliant, love this! Have a fabulous time 🙂 I’m not going to make it this year, but I had a wonderful time the past two years! Enjoy, and thank you for sharing with #ThePrompt x

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    Jo Sandelson - June 3, 2016

    Thanks so much Sara, great to get feedback especially on this one which took 4 days to draw including 65 revisions! Sorry you can’t come but maybe next year. x #ThePrompt

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Fiona - Coombe Mill - May 27, 2016

What a lovely way to start my bank holiday weekend. After a bottle of bubbly I laughed out loud perhaps more than I should have at this. Brilliant images. You are so clever and so funny. Can’t wait to catch up in June.

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    Jo Sandelson - May 29, 2016

    Ooh thanks for the lovely thumbs up Fiona. I had such fun drawing these though it took 4 days in the end! Just look out for the green-faced woman at BML! No I am pleased for you, was just looking at your blog with OH and we can see why you got through to the Finals 🙂 thinking of booking too if we find any availability!! 🙂

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David Mellor - June 1, 2016

Very funny and I love the cartoons. The one stealing all of the goody bags great! Have a good time at BML and best of luck.

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    Jo Sandelson - June 3, 2016

    I met the real David Mellor once or maybe you really are him? Gave me a slice of his birthday cake just before an election (he was my MP and it wasn’t like that). Thanks and glad you liked the cartoons x

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Single Mum Speaks - June 1, 2016

OMG this is amazing. I won’t say which of these will be most like me at Britmums. Hopefully not the murderous one, but I have to admit that some of the others are looking likely. How did I not know of your blog before? So glad I read this! #BloggerClubUK

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    Jo Sandelson - June 3, 2016

    Hi Elaine, yup neither can i say which is the real me. Jekyll, Hyde and their 8 multiple personality disordered brothers? I think its par for the course if you’re a mum. Someone said recently she was judged a good parent only because they saw her in public. I’ve also looked at your blog for first time and you write very well indeed. Are you very old or honest? I read quite a few of your own hair raising posts from before. Hope to see you at BML. Let me know which corner you’ll be howling in and I’ll join you xJo #BloggersClubUK

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Jess Powell (Babi a Fi) - June 1, 2016

Haha, this is awesome! I can’t make it this year, but hopefully next 😀 #bloggerclubuk

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    Jo Sandelson - June 3, 2016

    Brilliant it’s so good to get feedback from genuine bloggers – my family don’t quite understand what the hell I’m doing at blogging events and this post didn’t really help 😉 Sorry to be missing you Jess but yeah maybe next year x #BloggerClubUK

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Baby Isabella - June 1, 2016

Hahah! Love this….last year my mummy nearly ended up with two goodie bags!! 😉 she wasn’t stealing honest… Just got handed 2. Great cartoons! Have a fantastic time!

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    Jo Sandelson - June 3, 2016

    Yeah I think at the end there are some left over and they give you two. Or was that Blogfest? Or Royal Garden Party? Shit I’ve forgotten.

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justsayingmum - June 2, 2016

Ha ha ha ha! Love it! So pleased you’re going – would be great to meet you! Love number 4 – are you just going for the party? Excellent – me too! I look forward to the drawings for after the BML! #BloggerClubUK

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    Jo Sandelson - June 3, 2016

    Hi Helen, Thanks for that – let me know where you’ll be and would love to meet up. I don’t ENTIRELY look like the No. 4 drawing, sometimes there isn’t a traffic cone on my head. I’ll be going all Saturday and making copious notes in endless seminars which will then get filed and lost. Will be staying Sat night so time for a drink i hope. #BloggerClubUK

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Debbie - June 2, 2016

Hi Jo, highly humourous and having never been to a blog conference a little scary (judging by your images!). One day I hope to get to a blogging conference and I’ll know exactly how to behave.

xx

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    Jo Sandelson - June 3, 2016

    HiDebbie, glad you liked it. I hope i didn’t give too ghastly a picture of blog conferences. They’re quite alot of fun if you meet up with your friends and don’t have a child to look after. Last time I treated myself to upmarket hotel and loved the luxury of having this time to myself and gaining a pair of posh hotel slippers (freebies!). Almost worth it for that alone. xx

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Cal at Family Makes - June 2, 2016

Very very clever indeed! I’m not coveting or anything, of course! Have a great time at BML. #BloggerClubUK

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    Jo Sandelson - June 3, 2016

    Heh heh. Thanks so much Cal 🙂 #BloggerClubUK

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Random Musings - June 7, 2016

Brilliant, the cartoons are hilarious! I’m not sure I’d be able to stick to just one glass of wine though lol
Thanks for linking up to #BloggerClubUK 🙂
Debbie

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    Jo Sandelson - June 7, 2016

    Hi Debbie, well maybe two SMALL glasses then as hotel just across the way Jo x

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Becky Cowley - June 8, 2016

Great post, made me chuckle! This will be my first BML

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    Jo Sandelson - June 9, 2016

    Thank you Becky – look out for a woman with a traffic cone on her head and offer her a drink, but only a little one. Well done you again for getting through to the Finals – I was dead excited when it happened to me last time, but the tension leading up to the announcements was not easy, so I recommend heavy duty anti perspirant 🙂 x

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Sunita - June 13, 2016

So funny. It’s my first BML and can’t wait! Cartoon post conference write up please!!!

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    Jo Sandelson - June 13, 2016

    Really pleased you liked the 10 Commandments Sunita! Re. post conference write-up, I’ll be getting to work on that after BML, but in the meantime, here’s an earlier one when I was a Finalist in 2014! bit.ly/1o1VGJo

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Jennifer Howze - June 13, 2016

*REALLY* funny and sage advice. You are such a talented artist.

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    Jo Sandelson - June 13, 2016

    Thanks for stopping by and commenting. Always lovely to get a thumbs up from someone who knows their Britmums inside out! 🙂

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Laura Threesypeasy - June 13, 2016

ThIs is fab and your drawings are AMAZING! Im off to BritMums and I usually need a vino to settle ones nerves but it can also make me sin a little (only in a sense of no. 3&4) I’m very nervous, completely clueless and know no-one! It’s the scarieSt thing ever xx

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    Jo Sandelson - June 13, 2016

    Well come over and have a vino with me then. Nothing to be scared of really as most people only worried if they have anything stuck in their teeth and skirt tucked into knickers. I think there’s a FB page and i’ll go and lurk and leave a message. Glad you like the drawings. xxJo

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Sarah MumofThree World - June 14, 2016

These pictures are ace! Love the naughty baby doing the Vs and the embarrassed woman sneaking off with all her goody bags.
I will see you there!

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    Jo Sandelson - June 14, 2016

    hehe i particularly enjoyed doing those ones! See you Sarah and thanks for commenting – lovely to get feedback on this one especially.

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Frances Taylor - June 14, 2016

Brilliant! I’m looking forward to it even more now. I’ll be the one sneaking off with the bags. Or the drunk one. Maybe both. Thanks so much for linking to #chucklemums, I really enjoy your blog 😀

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    Jo Sandelson - June 14, 2016

    i’m chuffed you like it. Yeah let’s break out of there with the goodie bags. Last time i gave most stuff away so it would be more like Robina Hood. Let me know where you’ll be lurking. I’ll need a laugh after listening to the tenth widget seminar. 🙂 x

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Turning Up In Devon - June 15, 2016

Ha ha v funny, no 10 is particularly fab! (love the baby) I’m very new to blogging and can’t come to BML this year (him indoors’ Birthday) and I’m well jell to be missing it, hope to come next year! Really glad I found your blog, will be back 🙂 #chucklemums

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    Jo Sandelson - June 15, 2016

    My baby used to do just that or was it my imagination? I can see you are a newbloggie but you have refreshingly different and unusual style – please try for next year and move him indoors’ birthday to another date. Is Nadderbanks an anagram? just wondered #chucklemums

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Lucy at occupation: (m)other - June 15, 2016

I read this a while ago and loved it – back today from #chucklemums…can’t believe we are less than two weeks away, I needed this reminder of how I should be conducting myself. Do you think I could get away with a traffic cone despite not actually being able to drink!? I may give it a whirl. Will attempt to track you down (again in a non-stalkery fashion!)

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    Jo Sandelson - June 15, 2016

    hehe yes definitely but depends where you put the traffic cone. please look me up. I have all these intentions for meeting fab bloggers then i forget who everyone is and confuse peoples’ names and ask after their kids which turn out to be someone’s pet rabbit or gerbil name. And then the hours pass staring at some green mush in a liquidiser and trying to look like i understand widgets. We will all be in a post EU Ref blur from 2 days before won’t we so I think I’ve forgotten BML before its actually happened #chucklemums

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You Baby me Mummy - June 16, 2016

Ha ha! So funny. Have a wonderful time. Thanks for linking up to #TheList x

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Sarah - June 16, 2016

This is brilliant! The green face one is my favourite! #chucklemums

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    Jo Sandelson - June 17, 2016

    hehe yes she could be green too because of falling in the green smoothie mush (see 2014) as well as the green eyed monster. Jo x #chucklemums

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Claire - Life, Love and Dirty Dishes - June 17, 2016

Duly noted! Loved this. Hope to see you there. Thanks for linking up to #FridayFrolics

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    Jo Sandelson - June 17, 2016

    Happy you liked the post Claire. Yes hope to see you too in real life at #BML16 #FridayFrolics

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Tim - June 17, 2016

I’ve just jotted these all down – assuming the same commandments apply to dads as well?

A slight addendum to numbers 8 & 10, though – it’s perfectly okay to covet the wine on thy neighbour’s table, and to steal it while they’re not looking. It’s what Charles Darwin termed ‘survival of the drunkest’. That’s right, isn’t it? #fridayfrolics

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    Jo Sandelson - June 18, 2016

    Gosh Tim I’ve had it on good authority that you are an upstanding member of society and how do I square this with nicking someone else’s vino? One up i suppose on knocking back another’s canned beer which may have any number of things lurking unpleasantly inside. ‘Survival of the drunkest’ though is a terrific new term that Darwin probably would have coined on his interminable voyages to study wildlife. Since I can do that in the back garden and have access to a chilled Chablis too, think Charles might have saved a bit of time and compared slugs and whether they look like their cousins at home. Thanks for popping by Jo x

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Mrs Lighty - July 2, 2016

Ah this is fab! I haven’t been yet (hoping to go next year) but I shall bear your commandments in mind!! Love the drawings! #fortheloveofBLOG 🙂

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Louise (Little Hearts, Big Love) - July 2, 2016

Oh I love this – such a funny take on the 10 Commandments for Britmums Live and I do love the Thou shalt not steal one with all the goody bags! Brilliant! 🙂 #fortheloveofBLOG

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the frenchie mummy - July 2, 2016

I hope you aapplied them all! Great drawings
#fortheloveofBLOG

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Joanne Mallon - July 3, 2016

Love this! I think my most embarrassing moment was turning up to a blog conference wearing the top I was also wearing in the pic on my About Me page. “Oh shit, I’ve come as my blog” was my aghast thought when I realised. But I don’t think anybody noticed. At least not until I blogged about it later.
#KCACOLS

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    Jo Sandelson - July 5, 2016

    So true Joanne. I find it easy sitting in my studio to imagine that others know my work more than they could possibly have time for. If I think I’d like more comments like yours, I remember that 70% of my time is dashing about on school runs and domestic chores let alone blogging and work. I honestly wouldn’t have a clue about what anyone else was wearing at a blog conference as it’s a congratulatory slap on the back just to recognise someone’s face. Hope to see yours next year 🙂 #KCACOLS

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kid can doodle - July 3, 2016

How was the conference? I’ve not heard about it! Love your doodles. #kcacols

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    Jo Sandelson - July 5, 2016

    Really fun thanks. Didn’t go to the Friday night bash so Saturday was a bit hectic as sessions were all in one day. Here’s my cartoon take on it together with encounter with the lovely Carol Smillie bit.ly/29qkBIe #KCACOLS

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New Mummy Blog - July 3, 2016

Haha brilliant! I love your cartoons, they’re hilarious 🙂 I was there too, so maybe meet you next year instead! #kcacols

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    Jo Sandelson - July 5, 2016

    Hiya, yes come and find me if we’re both there. I’ll have a red sweaty face with pandemonium hair unless they don’t have tennis next year. Thanks for stopping by #KCACOLS

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A Moment With Franca - July 5, 2016

haha this is great! Thanks God I haven’t had any embarrassing moments when I attended a blogging conference before although I have only been to 3 and 4 after BML. I guess they were all fine. It was very nice to meet you there and also I’m so happy you managed to link up with us at #KCACOLS. It is great to now see your drawings as we were talking about it last time but I haven’t seen them before. They are amazing and you are so talented! So happy to have you for the first time. I hope that you like it. It would be lovely to see you again next week, 🙂 xx

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    Jo Sandelson - July 6, 2016

    I had to look up 3 and 4 but yeah thats allowed and i’m sure a traffic cone on your head would look quite fetching. Thanks for welcoming me to #KCACOLS. It took me a week to work out what it stood for ha! Glad you like the drawings too Franca. xxJo

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The Pramshed - July 7, 2016

This is fab and did you only stick to one glass of wine, and only take one BML goodie bag home? Thanks for linking up a 2nd post with us this week at #fortheloveofBLOG. Claire x

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    Jo Sandelson - July 7, 2016

    Yup only one glass of wine i think. Well it was one glass but possibly the amount of wine in it varied. Took two goodie bags only because they were foisted on me by organisers. Left a great deal at The Montcalm as my wheelie case was too small and some of the baby stuff too young. Hope the staff had kids or relations who enjoyed it. #fortheloveofBlog Jo x

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Claire at Tin Box Traveller - July 9, 2016

Tee-hee! Very funny. I hope you had a great #BML16 #KCACOLS

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    Jo Sandelson - July 9, 2016

    Thaks Claire. Yes it was great thanks – I wrote about it all here bit.ly/29qkBIe #KCACOLS

    Reply
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