Heard the news? There’s going to be a major government study of 2,500 children into whether mobile phones are dangerous for their health. Doesn’t it feel like we’ve been here before? So why hasn’t anything been done since this was last flagged up five years ago? Oh, not the mobile phone companies’ tax contribution to the economy surely?
Anyway, what are a few electromagnetic radioactive rays going to do to children? Actually quite alot. A Canadian friend and his three mates put their mobiles on the table with a corn kernel in the middle. They got those four phones to ring at the same time and voila! Popcorn!
So, does this mean we can’t put the baby in the microwave anymore for a quick zuzz? Bother – really saved on hanging out those wet towels didn’t it?
Seriously, do these phones affect mental development in children? The research is going to include a test for 11-12 yr old kids which will be redone in three years time. Nice idea but not thought through. Here’s an example of the sort of test they’ll most likely do.
Psychologist: “You’ve had a quick look at all these objects that are now under a blanket. How many are there and what percentage are green and/or red? “
12 year old “a) 63 b) 7% and c) 3%”
15 year old “Who gives a sh**”
Does that tell you your teenager’s brain has been scrambled in the intervening 3 years?
My gripe is that it’s not only the radiation. Kids don’t in fact put the phone to their ear as much as adults – they text. Simpler. It’s the lack of proper communication that’s scary. No eye contact = no responsibility. Been there myself.
How to end a relationship by text:
If your child goes to a private school, they get extra lessons in this sort of thing:
“It’s not you, Frederick, it’s me. I’m so awfully sorry”
Useful too for those tricky communications with a parent:
“Mum I’ll be late home in detention again” is much easier as a written message than having to deal with those messy, shouty emotions that come back to you :
“What the f*** you little w*****. Have you been nicking from the teacher’s purse again?”
Or Plummy Mummy’s response :
“Isabella, I’m terribly disappointed in you and so is your father. We already give you plenty of pocket money”
How I use mobile phones of course is a different matter altogether. I did manage to summon up this tray recently when ill in bed by texting downstairs … probably a one-off but worth a burst of radiation