Jeremy Corbyn and Diane Abbott

Hey ho Jez it’s not an easy ride when you’re committed to footsoldiers like this. What is it about your second-in-command ?

She reminds me of the bossiest of bossies in the ‘A’ Level Bossy class. As well as that she doesn’t do adding up and she doesn’t do apologising. Not my cup of tea at all. Just what does she (still) have on you that you can’t let her go? On second thoughts I’d rather not know.

The other day I nearly committed to voting for you. Laura Kuenssberg on the telly asked about your plans for Brexit if Labour got in, and for a split second, it seemed as though you might pull out of the whole bloody mess.

That was your chance Jez to sweep every Remainer in the country to your bosom. Well you blew it if it was more votes you were after – time after time you waffled and prevaricated as though you were on the stump in a strong Tory constituency fighting for all your worth against the wicked paymasters.

The politics of negativity doesn’t win in the end. ‘Stronger together’, ‘En Marche!’, ‘One man, one vote!’, ‘Make love, not war!’, ‘Power to the People’, ‘Liberté, Egalité, Fraternité’, and my all time favourite – ‘Yes, we can!’ which as any fule kno helped Bob the Builder (as well as his friend Barack) in all his adventures and he probably would have got my vote for leader of the Labour party.

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